This week I was rubbed the wrong way by a parent. I’m not sure why this person bothered me so much, but he did. Instead of being pissed about it, I decided to be have a little fun with it. The result is THE BLACK

[DAD] LIST. I’m black listing nouns (people, places, things, ideas) from a dads point of view. I hope to do this kind of thing regularly, but I’m not making any promises.

Here’s why I chose to Black [Dad] List “holier than thou” parents:

5. They think their kids walk on water. OK maybe they do (there are some really sweet kids out there) but you shouldn’t make other parents feel like they drew the short straw by rubbing it in. We all work with, and love, our kids so let’s be more supportive.

4. They think they have the parenting thing perfected. No one is perfect. Didn’t their mothers and fathers tell them that? Even fabulous parents have moments where they question their decisions. Stop being so cocky!

3. They dole out advice with a heaping helping of judgment. This is supposed to be reserved for mother-in-laws, not your parenting peers. There is nothing worse than hearing “my kid would never do that, but you should try XY and Z to address it.” If your kid never did it, how can you give advice on how to address it?

2. They can’t admit when they screwed up. Don’t make excuses, make a resolution to handle it better next time. Plus, kids don’t know when you’ve screwed up anyway, which says to me that there is no reason to be uptight about it. This one is not limited to parenting.

1. They lie about how their kids don’t watch TV. But if you play the theme song to Dora, Blues Clues, Elmo’s World, the Wiggles, or even Scooby Doo their kid will start singing and dancing like everyone else’s. There’s nothing wrong with a little TV.

“Holier Than Thou” parents, consider yourselves Black [Dad] Listed.