Of the 413 times a day that my son uses the restroom he probably washes his hands about four. When I catch him I make sure that he washes thoroughly with soap (I have to specify the soap part). I, on the other hand, wash my hands 413 times a day out of simple paranoia and a true dislike of avoidable communicable illnesses. I cringe when my son crawls into my lap early in the morning and taps me on the cheek because I don’t know where his hands have been. I will ask him if he’s washed his hands, he acts offended by my question, then he runs off to wash them. I don’t get the impression that girls are as anti-hand washing as boys, though I could be wrong.
While I have patience for little boys with germy hands, I have absolutely no tolerance for adult males. My hunch is that men don’t feel the need to wash their hands after they urinate because they hold onto a belief that touching their member is like touching their arm, or more sadly, their finger. After all no one washes their hands every time they pat their biceps and welcome their lady friends to the gun show. Men psychologically equate the two acts, which is obviously nasty. How many times have you seen a man publicly walk away from a urinal, or a stall and then right out the door? Probably every disgusting day. Heck, you may be that dude.
I know that my boy is always in a rush and 40 seconds of hand washing seems cumbersome, so I’ve been trying to get him to do an anti-bacterial hand gel pump (thanks to mom for keeping us stocked) after every #1 and an elbow-to-fingertips washing after every #2. It kind of works, though I’m still a big fan of soap and water after every time you walk into a bathroom whether you go or not.
(I apologize for posting about using the bathroom and peeing so much lately, but when you have a four year old reaching for the bacon at breakfast hygiene becomes a priority topic.)