When my son was born his body temperature was a bit low. In order to get it to normal he was taken away and put under a special baby-warming heat lamp. While the treatment was being explained to me I thought of flame broiling burgers at Burger King. My kid was going to be delicious.
After being out of my sight for a few seconds I decided to go looking for him. I found my brand new little guy across the hall wearing a tiny diaper and a gauze cap. He seemed vulnerable in the small room as he was slowly being warmed up. I looked him over, counting fingers and toes, and took in the fact that we shared a face. And I noted that his navel was gross.
In an instant it was like the weight of the world landed upon my shoulders. I suddenly realized I was going to be responsible for helping him become a good man – a good black man. I knew my life would never be the same again.
Eventually I built up the nerve to touch him (after a little encouragement from the nurse that had come and gone) and I placed my pinky finger in his munchkin hand. In a voice that he seemed to recognize I whispered to him that I would be there for him no matter what obstacles he may face in this life. I told him how difficult becoming a black man would be, but that together we would make it. Iâ€™ll never forget those first moments I spent alone with my son as his dad. They inspired me to do everything I do todayâ€¦
I graduated Cum Laude with a BA in Urban Studies from Hunter College and I recently became Director of Operations (for Early Childhood Programs) for the largest non-profit children’s charity in NYC. This is in addition to my work with Malecare, Inc as a program director/developer. My wife Shalawn, is a licensed Medical Social Worker and psychotherapist, and my four year old son Devin is currently unemployed.
Visit and comment often – that’s what this blog is all about!
You can also email me directly at firstname.lastname@example.org
I really enjoyed reading your blogs. Keep up the wonderful work! I’m looking forward to reading more.
hi I dont have a blog here ,I just came across your while surfing the net. I admire you and your family and the role models you are for all of us.
If only we had more strong black men like you.
I as sure we could put a lot of jails out of service
thank for taking time to uplift our black youth.
I enjoyed reading this. I am fortunate to raised by a single male parents/role models: father and grandfather until I was 18 and moved to ATL to attend Morehouse College.
They are both alive and enjoying life to the fullest.
I am 34 years old and I am hoping to retire by age 40 and to retire my father at age 60. He is 56 years old.
Keep spreading more positive articles dealing with the African American fathers. We do exist!
This is a very inspirational and welcome blog.
I am the African American Dad of a 5 year old daughter and like you & your son, I cherish every second we get to spend together. I will definitely add you to my BlogRoll, so I can visit here on a regular basis… thanks!
I’ve just started a blog here and was pleased to see your blog. It’s an inspiration to see a Black man writing about his life.
Keep up the good work of raising awareness in Black fathers. With only about 25% of our Black children having fathers in the home, no wonder Philly and other cities are experiencing such a homicide rate among Black males. 76% of Hispanic children in America have two parents in the home. Compare the statistics on success of these children to Black children. You may be amazed. I am sure Jesus looks down and weeps over Black children.
I feel the same way about my two year old son. The can frustrate the mess out of me at times, but we’re in this together. Raising a positive black man in today’s society will be a lot of work. Stay positive.
first time on your blog. i have to say reading your post almost brought tears to my eyes. i’m sure with you being in his life…he will be a good black man.
bless always =:O)
Today is my lucky day to have stumbled upon your blog. Excellent.
Man, I’m proud of you!!!
From a single Black mom who’s still trying to figure out what spirit took super glue grip of one African daddy’s senses, I must say that it sure is nice to meet you! Keep it up! May God bless you accordingly.